Dining Room Furniture

Lust for the hutch: the tragic saga of dining room furniture

Their eyes met over the soft glean of the dining room furniture. He a migrant bean picker, she a trader in dining room furniture. He offered and she countered, she offered and he countered, and thus they transacted. He felt the enticement of her hutch and buffet; he stole a glimpse of her wine rack. But she was no novice to the ruthless world of dining room furniture...

She leaned over the polished mahogany dining room table and whispered, "The best dining room furniture doesn't come easily, my lad. How bad do you want it?" Then she sat back and relished in the long silence, supremely confident in the irresistible charms of her dining room furniture.

"I can't stand it!" He eventually retorted. "I must have your dining room furniture, and I must have it now! I've felt the soft touch of your sideboard... I'm beguiled by the thought of your ladderback chairs. Please, please... let me partake of your dining room furniture!"

"There are men all over the city who'd pay dearly my dining room furniture," she teased. "And I have but one set of dining room furniture to give. You must prove yourself worthy."

"Dining room furniture..." he gasped. "Dining room furn..." And he fell lifeless to the (laminate) floor. Not the first man, and not the last, to be overcome by the bewitching allure of dining room furniture.